Humorous Wedding Speech by the Father of the Groom -- Wedding Toasts R

Humorous Wedding Speech by the Father of the Groom Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen - I am the groom's father, Ken, and I have the great privilege of being best man. I have recently found out there are two reasons why J W asked me to do this job. 1) To make him look younger and slimmer in the photos. 2) Because he didn't want to burden any of his friends with the terrible prospect of having to give this speech. It's the speech that no one wants to do. The best man doesn't really know what he's expected to say and yet his speech is supposed to be humorous - but it might not be. It's supposed to be short - but it probably won't be. It should be original - but it seldom is. It should not offend - and most do. And finally, it's supposed to be sincere and I certainly intend mine to be. In fact, I cannot be more sincere than to say to my son what an honor you have done to me by asking me to be your best man today. That said, while you are all here to enjoy yourselves, the poor best man has to work for his supper - not that he is able to enjoy his food for the thought of making that speech. He is so nervous he can hardly eat his meal. J W, seeing how nervous I was, arranged for me to have the best seat in the house - namely cubicle 3 in the Gent's toilet. There's even a sign behind the door which reads 'the best man inspects these toilets at 15-minute intervals. If you have any complaints please report it ... ...come so fond of Kathy and we looked upon her as a daughter that we had gained. I can but wish the new Mr and Mrs Wilson every success in the future. As I said at the start I'm not very sure what a best man is supposed to say in his speech. I do know he really has only one thing he must cover and that is to say to the groom 'J W, on behalf of the matron of honour and the bridesmaids thank you very much for all that you said. I can only but agree with your comments. I would like to finish my speech by making a toast to the two most important persons here today - Ladies and gentlemen - a toast to the Chef and the Barman. Thank you. Only kidding, the toast is to J W and Kathy - the Bride and Groom.